Questions…No answers.

Why do we run out of sympathy? What is the evolutionary purpose of not wanting to try anymore, of disillusionment, of getting tired of other people being sad? I thought that when issues run for a long time, when someone hurts for a long time or when a country is in pain for decades, that it was an indication that things deteriorated and need more help than ever. Why then do we forget?

Leaving behind the weak. Tiring of altruism – giving and not receiving. Simply the limitations of empathy.

I wonder how much of evolution is relevant to our lives these days. How much, really? We move faster now, nature can’t catch up. Things are about so much more than just sex and children. What about the people who don’t want to have kids at all? Now that’s anti-evolutionary sentiment. Is it a large-scale social observation that we’re making: that we don’t need to so ardently pursue the survival of species? Is there an off-switch for instinct? At what point does the thought of ‘more children’ become one of competition and not joy? We give up parenthood and childbirth to avoid pain, disruption to our jobs and simply because it complicates things.

Marriage rates fall, divorce rates rocket. The industry of the pill, the car and media expands. Life moves so fast now. Who has much time for others when they have to think about a job – the economy – family – friends – fashion – television – money – housing – politics – internet – appearance – health – the environment – the future, the future we’re creating that will ever be harder, better, faster, stronger. The weak are left behind in pursuit of a delicate balance of all the personal complications that is one person’s life. Who has time for a beggar in the street, a boy with a broken body, a girl who talks to the air, a man who drinks himself to oblivion. Whatever the limits of compassion, it’s significant that one of the more rapidly expanding industries today is the psychology industry – where people are paid to continue to care.

I admire people who have the passion and determination to pursue good causes. I admire that they do not care about the game of “wealth” and “security” that we all seem to be caught in. However, I’m also torn between fixing what has already happened and advancing into the future. The future could mean a solution to problems of the past. It could also mean leaving them further behind. Who’s to know? Both are necessary, but where does someone decide to place themselves? How do you keep it all in balance?

I will end this abruptly because I have nothing else to write. As an utterly irrelevant conclusion:

Such happy exclusion. Sometimes, nothing hurts more than those people not even realising that they’ve injured you – because, of course, you have no reason to be hurt, do you?